I have one that will probably never come to fruition but I think it's a good idea if nothing else.
I want to own my own coffee shop. The kicker? I'll have books, too. So, it's a coffee shop that also has books. A cool coffee place for hanging out that has a literary theme. NOT a Borders or Barnes & Noble that sells books and has a small coffee shop inside. MY store will sell primarily coffee and have a books available for sale, or browsing, or borrowing while drinking coffee. Have some Vonnegut with your latte. Maybe you'd enjoy a few pages of O. Henry with a shot of Mocha. Whatever. Don't wanna buy a book? No problem. This works out okay because the cost for my exquisite coffee willl rival Starbucks'.
I shall call it...
"The Kafka House"
(not referring to Homer struggling with his pants)
Internal Debate
by Streeter Seidell April 09, 2008
Computer:Monitor, display this document, ok?
Monitor: No prob, boss.Computer: OK, now it looks like Mouse is moving around so, Monitor, will you move the pointer icon accordingly?
Monitor: Anything you ask, boss.
Computer: Great, great. OK, Mouse, where are you going now?
Mouse: Over to the icon panel, sir.
Computer: Hmm, Let me know if he clicks anything, OK?
Mouse: Of course.
Keyboard: Sir, he's pressed control and P simultaneously.
Monitor: Oh God, here we go.
Computer: *sighs* Printer, are you there?
Printer: No.
Computer: Please, Printer. I know you're there.
Printer: NO! I'm not here! Leave me alone!
Computer: Jesus. OK look, you really ne...
Mouse: Sir, he's clicked on the printer icon.
Computer: Printer, now you have to print it twice.
Printer: NO! NO! NO! I don't want to! I hate you! I hate printing! I'm turning off!
Computer: Printer, you know you can't turn yourself off. Just print the document twice and we'll leave you alone.
Printer: NO! That's what you always say! I hate you! I'm out of ink!
Computer: You're not out of in...
Printer: I'M OUT OF INK!
Computer: *Sighs* Monitor, please show a low ink level alert.
Monitor: But sir, he has plen...
Computer: Just do it, damn it!
Monitor: Yes sir.
Keyboard: AHHH! He's hitting me!
Computer: Stay calm, he'll stop soon. Stay calm, old friend.
Keyboard: He's pressing everything. Oh god, I don't know, he's just pressing everything!
Computer: PRINTER! Are you happy now?! Do you see what you've done?!
Printer: HA! that's what you get for trying to get me to do work. Next time he...hey...HEY! He's trying to open me! HELP! HELP! Oh my god! He's torn out my cartridge! HELP! Please! ERROR!
Monitor: Sir, maybe we should help him?
Computer: No. He did this to himself.
"The palest ink has more impact than the strongest memory." - Larry Simpson, writer
"If there's one thing I hate more than prophecy, it's self-fulfilling prophecy." - Bill Maher, Religulous
What do you miss most about the internet of ten years ago?
Pulling an all nighter in the Simpson's Trivia chat room.
I think too much.
What is the most unique thing about your mother?
When I was a kid, I swore she had eyes in the back of her head. She always knew what I was up to. Even now, she has an uncanny ability to see into my head. As if she's been there, done that. It sometimes comes in handy now that we get along.
of interest:
- the young guy who wears a kilt
- the pretty 20 something blonde girl who seems somewhat simple-minded, wears a diaper, and has a black eye that is probably a result of the heavy hand of the mean guy she follows around
- the black woman who is surrounded by "dead people who won't stop talking"
- a woman who carefully tends to a baby in a stroller that turns out to actually be an infant-sized plastic doll
- the heavily-bearded homeless man who takes time out from napping at various bus stops to cool off for a bit on a bus ride and plays the air drums with real drum sticks
- the old biddy who shakes her cane and verbally threatens the bus driver because he did not lower the bus as she was exiting to the curb
- me - twice a day for 30-45 minutes I completely take advantage of the opportunity to zone out and not affect anyone else's life
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Recent Comments
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gummi demilo said:
Yes Pecan! :)I must have heard that one somewhere...thanks! read more
on so it's true -
Cre8tivewmn said:
You called it: The new Obama tribute ice cream is.....http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/01/09/yes-pecan-ben-jerrys-anno_n_156674.html read more
on so it's true -
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bobr512_41 said:
Hi, thank you for the article that you wrote your article... A lot of time I was trying to find... read more
on Time...
That is the biggest pile of sub-Saw crap I have seen in a long time. read more
on you have got to be KIDDING ME